Pet Beetle

It was kind of sad and pathetic to me several weeks ago (Yes, that is how far behind I am with my blog posts!), that Sky Baby was so excited about her new pet beetle.  Little did I know how important the bug jar she had retrieved from her classroom's treasure box, was going to mean so much to her in a matter of a day or so!  She went on a quest to find insects, but it seemed like it went a little deeper than that, especially when she found this horned beetle and named the little guy; however, for the life of me, I do not remember its name!

Yes, she found this insect and named it as she gave it a home.  She even researched the insect and discovered what kind of beetle she had in her care and what kind of food and such the little beetle would prefer, which was great and was a great project for her to do and to learn from, but I discovered that it went a bit deeper than that for her.  It was her "pet".  Yep, we had a pet beetle in a bug jar that she decorated.  She fed it, and she talked to it, and she was proud of it!

Some of you may be wondering why this beetle being her pet became a big deal to me.  Through this pet beetle, who has since past on to the great beetle heaven in the sky, I realized how much my kids--all of them--would like a pet.  However, now is just not the right time for various reasons.  While I have my legit reasons, knowing they desire a companion as I had as a child growing up, made me a little sad that I am unable to provide that for them at this time.

Scot and I used to have a dog named Toby.  He was a Cocker Spaniel (did I spell that right?) mix, and although I was warned by a tech vet who knew that one day we wanted children that such a dog wasn't good with children and were over bread, we got him anyways.  Well after several years went by and two children had arrived with our third one on the way, Toby couldn't take it anymore and to be frank we couldn't take him anymore as he started to snap and try to bite us--even Scot.  We finally made the difficult decision to return Toby to the rescue society before he ended-up biting one of us or our children, which would have made finding him a new home even more difficult.  This dog also had various health issues, such as doggy IBS (Irritable Bowel Syndrome) and cleaning up after him and having kids playing on the floor was just beginning to be too much.  Being in a townhouse also didn't provide us many options.  We didn't have a garage or anywhere to keep him, especially if his mess well... you know... um... had gotten on his fur coat, and a bath was required.  One night all we had was our cold, tiny, backyard for the guy until we were able to attend to him, which seemed cruel in a way.  So we returned him to the rescue group detailing to them that he needed a home with no children whatsoever.

Scot and I also had a cat named Pippi.  She was a good cat.  Just a bit stubborn and cranky, but she was good.  However, she ended up also being a cat with medical problems, which included allergies that needed the occasional steroid shot, and IBS as well.  And let's just say that even though she used the liter box, there were still several times that well... well... there was a mess all around.  Anyways, about two years ago, Pippi went into renal failure and was eventually put down.  We haven't gotten another cat for several reasons, but the main one is that this house is just too small for a pet right now.  There is just no place at all for a liter box.  In fact, Pippi's liter box eventually ended up (drum roll please!) in our master bedroom as our family expanded!  Yep, laying in bed listen to your cat take care of business and the smell that would often fill the room just became a bit much and very unromantic if you know what I mean!

Also, being a mom of four kiddos, I simply do not have the time to take care of another being at the moment.  A dog would have to be walked continuously, as our backyard is just way too small for animal waste and the continual clean-up.  I don't have the time to feed another mouth or make sure that someone feeds another tummy.  And sure, you all can say, "Make the kids responsible."  However, an adult--me--would have to ensure that the animal is being cared for appropriately.  The responsibility would most likely fall upon my shoulders, and over the last few weeks I have added more tasks to my already growing list of responsibilities without adding an animal to it. 

Someday when we have waited patiently, planned carefully, and can enjoy the benefits of delayed gratification, we will move to a larger house, and the kids will be older, and perhaps, I will be more adjusted, and another animal will be considered; however, as of now, a pet such as a dog or a cat, will just be too much.  Though Scot and I, okay may be more me, have been considering getting the kiddos a little hamster or the like in about six months or so.  I will let you know if we follow through on that idea!  And whether I am crazy or not!

Now I will close by saying that I may consider the beetle a pet of ours however brief a pet it was and although its name I cannot remember, because I have a memory of that beetle that I may remember always.  One day after observing the beetle had not moved for about 24 hours, I gave Sky Baby the sad news that I believed her pet had died.  She was sad but for a brief time and moved on.  The next day or so while the girls were at school, I heard a peculiar sound in my kitchen.  It was loud scratching.  I looked all around to find the source of the sound, but could not find it.  I kept hearing the noise, and I searched on and off for a bit.  I narrowed down the search area and started to worry that there was a mouse in our wall when I discovered that something was moving in the bug jar.  I looked at it closely.  The bug I had deemed to be dead was in fact a live and well.  It was so healthy in fact that he was moving a stone that Sky Baby had placed in the jar!  I had a good chuckle about our reincarnated pet beetle!  And it only lived a few more days after that!

Small Talk?

So I experienced something just the other day that reminded me of some of the reasons as to why I wanted to start this blog.  Being termed as a "large family" here in the United States can bring about all kinds of opinions, which often can generate a variety of unsolicited comments and looks.  It can make things rather interesting at times I must say.

Earlier this week, I went to a local grocery store to pick up a few, quick items.  I had just picked up the girls from school and I was taking all of my kiddos inside with me.  As I entered the store with all my kiddos in toe and as we were all smiling and chatting while Crazy Paizy was telling me about her day at school, we were interrupted by a woman leaving the store.  She asked me if all the kids were mine, and I replied with a huge smile, "Yes, they are all mine."  She proceeded to give me quite a look and responded with, "I feel sorry for you." I looked blankly at her for a second and proceeded to continue to walk on when I said something to the effect of, "Don't be.  We are good."  For which, her mouth dropped wide open, almost as if she was shocked by my response and thought I was some kind of Bible beater.

I went a little further inside the store, when I stopped as the girls and I started commenting about the lady's rude statement.  I told the girls that I was offended as Sky Baby asked what was a statement like that supposed to mean and why did the lady ask it?  Sky Baby's face explained it all to me.  Her expression confirmed to me that I had every right to be offended by such a rude statement and I will explain to you as to why.

So through another media outlet, other people got wind of my displeasure.  People voiced their opinions and let me know they liked what I said.  But I did have some people come to the defense of the other woman claiming that it was probably just her way of having "small talk."  I responded saying that I wasn't going to be privy to such kinds of "small talk" and here is why.

First of all, I am not one of those people who believes that people are innately good.  On the contrary, I believe that humans are innately sinful.  They are sinners who are in need of Jesus Christ, our Savior.  I had first hand experience with this woman's tone and expression, and for me it was not of a good and nice nature; however, I cannot be sure entirely what her true intentions were when she made that remark.  Perhaps she was just trying to simply strike up small talk, but I have a problem with that kind of small talk regardless of the intentions behind such remarks.

When somebody makes a comment like "I feel sorry for you" after you answered their question about all of the kids being yours, what is that person trying to achieve in such small talk as that?  It seems to me that they would like the mom [me] to agree with their statement, and to start complaining about her kids, and all she does for them, while standing amongst her children she speaks ill about.  It is as if that person wants the mom to start a pity party of sorts right in front of her children, which is undoubtedly wrong to do.

Now don't take me wrong.  There are challenges that do come with parenting as many children as I have; and I do experience some "moments" (as I like to call them and if you can get my drift) while out in public.  In fact, two of my children proceeded to have some brief horse play inside the very store just minutes after the lady made her comment; however, I addressed the situation and moved on.  I left as I had come in--smiling.  Parenting four children isn't always easy, however, I am blessed to be their mom.  They have blessed me and molded me into the person I am today; and therefore, I will not take part in such kinds of small talk.  I will not degrade my children, and I will most certainly not degrade my children in front of them and with a stranger who is supposedly trying to strike-up some kind of small talk!